Can You Remember The First Game You Ever Played?

I apologise for the obscurity of this particular thread, it’s already been a long week and I’m already feeling explicitly groggy. What follows will likely have no substantial relevance nor any decisive resolution, but is something that has become somewhat of a troubling curiosity. So let me begin with a question; do any of you remember the first time you experienced a computer game? I’d personally relish the opportunity to regale you with a sentimental anecdote about inheriting the families NES, being presented with my first games cartridge or narrate the time I was baptised in the accumulated tears of my father, shed through disappointment at trying to complete “Echo The Dolphin”. But with all honesty I don’t remember. I can recall brief images and vaguely distinctive periods of interacting with a game in my formative years, but nothing solitary that can be specifically defined as my first.

Some incipient dementia or perhaps good old senility has likely diminished my nostalgia leaden experiences. If you are in your early 20’s or younger, particularly if you regard Pokémon Diamond and Pearl to be “retro”, then relating back to your first gaming experience may be easier to perceive. But for me, a man in his 30’s, with a number of late nights and copious amounts of alcohol consumed in the interim it’s a far more difficult moment to recollect. It is however evident from my parents favourable affinity for gaming that my exposure would have occurred from a very young age, with a very limited capacity to fully understand what I was watching. Exactly what games console it was is in itself hard to clarify?

The NES is the most likely candidate, certainly the more prevalent console that I recall. But it could just as likely be the SEGA Megadrive too, as this would have been available at a time when I was more self-aware. Memories of playing “TMNT II” “Super Mario” “Donkey Kong” and “Captain Bucky O Hare” are all clearly defined memories. But so to are playing “Sonic The Hedgehog” “Cap Attack” “Mickey Mouse And Donald Ducks Fantasy Of Illusion” and “Cool Spot”. It’s maddening not being able to recollect a moment of such significance. To attach a visual narrative to such a profoundly intimate influence of self discovery.

Perhaps there isn’t one singular moment , but rather a series of amalgamated experiences that form “that first moment”. It maybe that the pleasures of gaming presided through repeated collaboration as opposed to one isolated eureka point. Whatever the case is I find I’m afflicted by a deep vexing sorrow for the absence of such a hugely defining moment.

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So again I beseech you curious reader; what game you remember playing first? Or have you too forgotten? Let me know in the comments below. Cheers.

My Top 10 Most Influential Games. #7:”Sonic The Hedgehog 2″.

Sonic 2’s aberrant influences are so ingrained in my lexicon that it’s frighteningly difficult to remember a time before it. In fact my entire existence can be distinguished by the partitions of “Before Sonic” (BS) and “After Sonic” (AS). Yes Sonic is my video game equivalent of Jesus! The obvious exception being that one was betrayed by those he trusted, crucified by his enemies, dying a slow and lingering death to a crowd of worshippers and apostles that mourned his devastating sacrifice. The other, was Jesus. A little harsh considering the ubiquitous analogy, but let’s not pretend that anything in Sonic’s recent history has ever emulated the same raucous quality that pervades his formative years. And that’s especially true when it comes to Sonic The Hedgehog 2.

Sonic 2 has the rather distinguished honour of being the only influential game in my Top 10 that I haven’t actually completed. Many frivolous attempts were made to conquer the sinuous rotations and elaborate perversions that infested these intricately dizzying tracks. Espousing an expeditious fluidity through many trying encounters, without succumbing to the inhibiting frustrations of clandestine obstructions that would emerge without warning along the hazardous route, causing Sonic to discharge gold rings like a Catherine wheel. I came close too, emerging from the penultimate battle with Metal Sonic, clinging desperately to one isolated gold halo only to capitulate to Robotnik after several gruelling seconds. And as for collecting all the Chaos emeralds, forget it! One of my earliest memories of playing Sonic 2 was being round a friend’s house trying to reach the end. We’d each take turns completing a stage at a time or if one of us died. We were in his living room along with his older sister, who I had a huge crush on. Somehow my adolescent mind concluded that being good at this game would somehow attract her, as if she would see me defeat Robotnik and be instantly overcome with lust. “Oh my, what nimble and strong thumbs you have. We should get married!”. But I never discover the truth behind that elaborate fantasy, yet despite that disappointment I never really believed that Sonic was a game that required completion. The journey itself was the reward, and what a journey it was.

“It was the speed and the consequence of that speed that kept me coming back.”

 

Up to this point in my relatively short tenure as a gamer, I had never played a game that incorporated such erratic and dynamic speed into its structure. Most games applied very basic, pedestrian traversal of levels, allowing players time to coordinate an appropriate action and trajectory to their attacks, like Mario jumping on a Goomba for instance. Yet Sonic demanded that same cautious application in a world that promoted elevated movement. Generating significant momentum was a precarious way of negotiating your way to the end, as that same dizzying acceleration was almost assuredly offset by the immediate devastating intervention of a spike or some meandering insect. Enemies were largely benign, but when you’re moving at such exaggerated pace these innocuous, barely mobile creatures become threatening implements of destruction. A brick wall for example is harmless, until you crash into one. It was never safe to run at such speeds, but you did it anyway. And that’s because it was fun, reckless and so innately juvenile.

“Someday I will defeat you.”

 

Kids have 2 gears, first and fifth! And this was certainly true of myself. I never walked anywhere, I ran, oftentimes challenging friends to races at inopportune moments. Sonic replicated that same volatility that I myself harnessed on a daily basis, just encapsulated in a computer game. The soundtrack was also incredibly conducive to being an energetic child. Each stage featured a melody that suited the environment you were in. It was simple, catchy and memorable. Seriously how many of you would be able to imitate the “Green Hill Zone” theme right now? Or recite the “SEGA” intro with the same distorted cadence without the slightest provocation or hesitation? And who amongst you is still terrified of the timer that commences whenever Sonic is close to drowning?! The anxiety and heart palpitating fear of aquatic levels was incubated right here. Any subsequent game that required even an interim requirement to monitor and conserve air terrified me!

“This still haunts my nightmares!”

 

Sonics enduring legacy is truly reliant on its formative succinct period of quality, namely Sonic 1 to 3. Everything that preceded these games just wasn’t the same. Whereas Mario successfully adapted to the progressive visuals and additional dimensions, the Sonic series never really acclimated to the same changing environment. It’s difficult being a fan of this original series, considering the sustained negligence it’s suffered over decades that has resulted in the declination of the brand and subsequent sale to SEGAs biggest rivals Nintendo. Something that my 8-year-old self couldn’t possibly comprehend. Yet that shouldn’t diminish the seminal impact this trilogy had on gaming, specifically myself. It was frenetic yet frustrating, simple yet difficult, compelling yet repetitious, but no matter how many times I failed, cursed in outrage at the controls in all my childlike obscenities, I kept coming back. Even now.

And that ladies and gentlemen is why Sonic The Hedgehog 2 is my #7.

My Top 10 Most Influential Games….. OF ALL TIME!

I have never done anything like this before. To be totally honest it’s never even occurred to me to catalogue an extensive assortment of properties with any succinct definition. To deliberately enunciate something as having a greater significance in your life over something else to me is a little foolish, a specious logic that can be interchanged or adapted to complement an opinion expressed one minute, that has the potential to change substantially by the time you wake up. To accurately determine this list with any significant structure is almost impossible and is one of the hardest thing I’ve ever attempted to literate. Trying to comprise such an extensive list of such redolent content, intimately personal to me required weeks of research to amiably facilitate and is a list that even now continues to change.

I’ll be honest with you now: I don’t want to mess this up. Gaming has been such a huge contributor in my life, especially as a kid. It provided a reliable stability at a time that my parents separated when I was about 8. Games nourished my soul when school or any academic study sought to broach my already fragmented teenage mind. However stressful work became I knew a good game could sooth and engage me in a way no other recreational activity could. They never criticised, tormented or berated me, they merely entertained, remaining a resilient and reliable source of comfort no matter how much life trolled you. So it’s with some anxious trepidation that I try and collate some of my favourite games into a definitive list.

Now I decided that “Inspirational” was a far more accurate expression than “Best” to describe the content listed. Though Best is a correlative term it doesn’t quite elegantly denote the spiritual stature that these 10 games represent. Best certainly doesn’t adequately define the intimate effect they’ve had on my upbringing nor their continued casual evocation in my later life. As such many of these games have some personal associations attributed to them, integrated somehow into childhood adolescents in some form making this an intimate list and not necessarily indicative of a games quality. I’m intending to post each of the games over separate articles through the next few months, time permitting of course. Like I’ve said these games are particularly important to me, each requiring their own dedicated space for me to competently articulate their significance in relation to my life. But before I delve into my top 10 I thought I take a moment to append a few other titles that didn’t quite make the cut. It was tough not including them and they all deserve recognition despite their absence from my definitive inventory. So in no particular order here are the titles that only just missed out:

The Last Of Us.

Mario Kart Double Dash.

Ratchet & Clank.

Micro Machines.

Onimusha 2.

World Of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse And Donald Duck.

Donkey Kong Country.

NBA Jam.

Tetris.

Bucky O Hare.

Bug.

Daytona USA.

Virtua Cop.

Pro Evoloution 3.

Road Rash.

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What games have inspire you most? Let me know in the comments below. Cheers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EGX Rezzed 2017 Round-Up.

I always enjoy my time scouring the new assortment of games displayed at Rezzed. It’s a more relaxed, less intrusive atmosphere than its errant, wholly boisterous partner EGX. But then it’s supposed to be an intimate accompaniment, that’s still lavished in its own contemporary charm. Because of the venues rather meager capacity- though I prefer “exclusive” – the public displays of commerce associated with this extravagant event are tempered, creating an immersive ambience that doesn’t feel as though you’re navigating through a herd of cows. Many of the games on demonstration have been developed by much smaller independent companies – with Sega now sadly categorised as such – that you can tell have been crafted with dedicated precision, as though they themselves have hued months of late nights and early mornings in preparation for today’s event. And it’s because of this fervour that allows Rezzed to exhibit the best in emerging talent without having to display the more illustrious contingency in the industry, that no doubt would attract the audiences these smaller companies endeavour to attract. This year has been no different.

It’s clear from the number of additional rooms that have been extended over this erroneously perceived “small” venue, that it has many hidden alcoves absent from recent years. Which can only be indicative of Rezzed growing popularity. Each room has been compartilised with absolute efficiency, giving a extravagant sense of a much larger exhibition in much more comfortable environment. Because there is only a partial roof covering the inner extremities of the Tobacco Dock, with bleached oakwood spires arching across and glass canopy over the rest, there’s none of that recirculated air stifling your lungs that ordinarily gives me a headache. This may seem like a trifling detail but you can never understate the importance of hydration and fresh circulatory system. For me it’s a much more congenial, almost outdoor environment that doesn’t feel confined nor exposed to the elements. Hell even the sun dared to impeach through and illuminate the venue. Which incidentally contained games to play. I should probably talk about those?

Due to an extended illness that continued unabated throughout the week, I didn’t get to play as many games as I’d like. Also I am not a patient man, averse to any lingering conga line that restricts my ability to play. I however forbade this social malady to indulge in some comforting nostalgia gravitating instinctively towards Sonic Mania. Curse you Sega you cruel temptress, you do know how to seduce my childhood nostalgia. Owing more to its more illustrious 2D era of cultural hysteria than its more recent, shall we say misguided iterations, Sonic Mania looks and plays like the exultant Megadrive days of yore. It illustrates everything that is great and annoying about Sonics formative years; the deceptive encouragement the game permits to run at a frenetic velocity, only for the game to punish you for such impudent displays of speed by impeding your momentum with spikes, walls, slow moving crustaceans – that still catch me out somehow?! – and other robotic aberrations. Sega have made a concerted effort to ensure Sonic Mania retains all of its nostalgic credentials that made this anarchic rival to Mario back in the 90’s so enduring and does so with aplomb. Even if it did make me move left! “What new devilry is this?!”

“Gang Beasts”, evidently a mainstay of Rezzed was as fun and irreverent as it was 2 years ago when I sampled it last. Gang Beasts centers around a group of gelatinous blobs that punch grapple and fight until only one remains. It’s an incredibly simple party game that will have you in fits of hysterics throughout the retinue of interactive enviroments, that it won’t even matter that the malformed blob you controlled falls off the ledge without actually combating another opposition. Nintendo made is presence felt too, arranging it’s multiple Switch devices in a kind of circular edifice, similar to Stone Henge. Presumably this was to attract maximum exposure so you couldn’t miss it. And also to sacrifice the Wii U in the center. In either case the Switch featured many smaller companies, focusing primarily on family friendly initiatives and party games like Dangerous Kitchens “De Mambo”, which Nintendo continues to do well. There were of course many more games to test, endorsements to be observed and presentations to be admired but as my nose began to run like Paula Radcliffe I knew I’d have to bow out early, with a 2 hour journey poised to consume what little energy I had left. It’s a shame as I wanted to be a little more comprehensive as I realise that there will probably be a hidden gem concealed in some darkened alcove that I’d be raving about, because that’s always the case with Rezzed.

Every year the standard of quality displayed at Rezzed diversifies, aided by the individualism of independent companies and ideologies. Allowing us to experience the unique ideas of developers who themselves have been nurtured on gaming culture. The cynic in me is hushed when I’m here, sampling the various content avaliable to me. My heart rejoices seeing just how influential these smaller developers are and how their passion for games has generated a renewed vigour in my own gaming compulsions. They’ve dared to dream, creating material they wanted not because it was popular or consumer friendly but because it was what they wanted to make. And it’s encouraging to know that creative games are still being developed to inspire, not exploit. Personally I can’t wait to go back again next year and discover further inspiration, without being ill of course!

The “PXP 3 Slim Station” Review.

Out of all the consoles I’ve come across over the years never have I purchased one that has a warning notification on the back that reads “Due to the characteristics of the LCD, there are some dots that do not light up or that never turn OFF. However, please take note that this is not a defect”. It’s fair to say that my suspicions about its functionality were more than a little roused? It’s like buying a car and being told that sometimes the brakes don’t work or that the condom you’re using has holes in. The “Portable PXP3 Slim Station” was a dubious investment, one motivated by curiosity above anything else, and when a package arrived weighing less than an anorexic cotton bud, that sceptical acrimony didn’t really recede. But maybe I’m being overly presumptuous, a little too pessimistic. Maybe it won’t be so bad? In the same way that having you’re ass hair removed with a blunt razor blade won’t be so bad? Or that a horror movie starring Pink might be better than expected (it’s not!). Sorry, sorry. I’m doing it again. Now to be fair the box that contains the Slim Station–a name that I’m sure Sony’s attorneys would be thrilled to hear about–is actually pretty cool looking. The design is a very bold, with vibrant red as if it’s been drawn by an excitable art student whose been forced to draw monochromatic portraits for years. It’s also veneered in this rather sparkly coating you’d get on a shiny Football sticker or Pokemon card. It has Spider-man lunging out of the screen, boasting 1gb of internal memory, depicting the absurd number of games available on the system, which I’ll get onto in a moment. Yet strangely the fraudulent box art, which has somehow managed to breach patents by Sony, Sega and Nintendo features products like Fifa, Super Mario and inexplicably Shaun The Sheep? None of which are available? In fact it’s resources are rather limited.

Despite the advertised “999666” game capacity, it’s actual content is something of an embellishment, in the same way that referring to the Holocaust as a “mild skirmish” might be considered understated. The box; comprised of the device, TV connection, a charger with a wire that’s the same length of an ants conservatory also comes with 2 compatible cartridges, as well as the systems own internal content, both of which boast similar exaggerated versatility to the number of games it contains. And though each of these units contains a robust roster of classic 16 bit titles such as TMNT, Shinobi, Sonic The Hedgehog, Decap Attack, Streets Of Rage and Golden Axe 2, it is in fact the same 40 or so catalogued games repeated. The number of actual games available is actually closer to 150 which isn’t actually too bad, even considering that some of these titles might not be entirely legitimate nor strictly legal. For instance Nintendo may have something to say regarding a game called “Super Mario Brothers”, which seems to be some form of derivative of the Super Mario Brothers format. But instead of jumping on Goombas, you throw crates at them, as you pick up diamonds along the way? There are various instances of trademark infringement on this device, including a rather jarring Harry Potter game. Yet the biggest infringement comes courtesy of the device itself.

“Yeah; I think Sony may have something to say about it’s design?”

It’s not just modelled on a PSP; it’s like an identical duplicate! Just cheaper looking. It’s like Blue Peter did an episode on “how to craft you’re very own PSP” using materials like Cardboard tubing, cereal box’s and sticky back plastic. The Slim Station (seriously, that’s a lawsuit pending right there!) is certainly not going to hold up to any abusive scrutiny, as it’s light and fragile build would likely shatter if it fell from you’re hand on to a bed of roses. And that’s if the loose buttons stay fitted! It’s also equipped with two shoulder buttons that have absolutely no use, a battery with the capacity to hold a charge as well as a Strawberry trifle (just over 2 hours). It’s impossible to play even while charging as the lead is roughly 30cm long, and if you’re playing a game and try to plug it in for an additional charge it just shuts off all together. It has a TV adapter that allows you connect it to you’re television. Not that I’ve been able to do this as much like the charger it doesn’t reach from the back of my TV and round so I can actually see what I’m playing! As I stated in my previous article you don’t actually get to choose the colour of the device either, just roll the dice and hope it doesn’t land on snack eyes, or in this case pink. Mercifully the one I received is black, furnished with a delightful courtesy scratch on the screen. The screen itself is small but serviceable and the sound is of reasonable quality. So yeah; it’s cheap looking, has a cheap feel and even smells cheap. So how well does it work? Not bad considering.

“Mario isn’t quite the way I remember it?” 

Yes it looks as though it’s been assembled by Stevie Wonder under the supervision of a toddler. It may very break by the time I’ve concluded this review, but it functions. It allows me to play long forgotten gems without winding my bank account. When you turn the switch on, it turns on. When it’s in the off position, it turns off. It would be insultingly deceptive if not for the clear clarity of the price. If you were expecting a quality item with no issues or falsities for £10, then you shouldn’t be allowed a credit card. It’s brazen exploitation of distribution rights is commendable as is it’s flagrant regard for spell-check. The two page instruction manual for instance details the device and how to be “playinging” it. Sometimes games don’t require profound ingenuity, in this case it didn’t even need to advertise itself effectively or even have instructions that are spelt properly. I misjudged this cheap little piece of plastic simply because it was cheap. Sometimes just having something do that is all you need.

It would be foolish of me to recommend this product; it’s largely rubbish, likely unreliable and it’s vulgarity as a purported console is only matched by its cheapness. In an era of technological innovation where consoles have to be multifaceted gaming platforms and streaming devices, as well as looking good doing it, the Slim Station is the PoundStretcher of home entertainment. But £10 for roughly 150 games, for a portable device that also connects to you’re television (sort of?) is a bargain by anyone’s estimate. Besides, I’m quite partial to some discount chocolate.

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The PXP 3 Slim Station is available at all good on-line retailers. And some bad ones too.