Fixing My PS5 Controller.

When it comes to technology, specifically the fundamentals of how they operate, I am as adept at there repair as the Amish. My comprehension of the mechanics of even modest appliances are probably a notch above “Witchcraft”. Having never been blessed with an inherent affinity for understanding the technical logistics, nor especially receptive to their qualities, the idea of repairing a damaged gadget offered no persuasive incentive. However, when the defective implement in question is my 6 month old PS5 controller, repair becomes essential.

The concern for me was the very abrupt severity of the situation. The button in question is the R2, universally recognised as firing trigger for every FPS in the past decade, and accredited as being the most comfortable and ergonomic option. While navigating Anglo-Saxon England as an invading viking in Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla I noticed that, while attempting a heavy attack the R2 button felt malleable. Demonstrating a receding rigidity you’d usually expect after many years of usage. It was apparent from its beleaguered response that something was wrong. Though the trigger still functioned, performing the necessary tasks instructed, the lack of tension made the controller vibrate. What was curious was the absence of any sudden trauma or excessive use that could expedite such a gradual certainty. For my part, I’ve been nothing but attentive to my new, very extravagant accessory.

A quick Google search revealed not only the root cause of the loose trigger, but the extent of the damage. A tiny, curved spring that enables the trigger to respond to specific stimulants the player experiences, like the taughtness of a bow string for example was the culprit. And judging by the dissemination of similar enquiries online, a common defect. Now if the device had been damaged by my own aggressive volition, fine. I’d have no complaints. But to manufacture a product with such an inherent fault, or at least questionable durability, is inexcusable!

Now at this point I had two choices: Either contact Sony directly to arrange for restoration of the device or request a replacement. The latter I had discovered much later was liable to be Sony’s response. Or attempt to remedy the situation myself. Considering the inevitable delay and my personal aversion to phone conversations, I decided the only solution was to replace the defective part myself. What’s the worst that could happen?

So I made all the necessary arrangements. Purchased the requisite components. Studied the process of safely dismantling the device. Assured by multiple videos that the process was simple, provided you were delicate. And with great reluctance began the gruelling 1.5 hour operation to surgically replace the PS5’S broken segment.

Anyone with even a degree of technical proficiency, isn’t likely to squander such an excessive amount time on procrastination and deliberation. But in my defence I was heavily sedated by Beer and pizza that prolonged my convictions. Arrested by an overriding anxiety. As you begin prising things apart, trying desperately not break some tiny, yet crucial mechanism, you become acutely aware that you could inadvertently do something you can’t reverse. But as I made cautious little incisions in the controller’s exterior, pausing the YouTube videos to ensure I was making the right apertures, things began to improve. Until the casually dissected parts strewn across the table like extracted organs began to grow, so did my confidence.

In fact the most difficult part of all, other than reassembling the fragile plastic casing that “slots” in beneath the analogue sticks, was maneuvering the compact spring into position. A process only exacerbated by my fat, clumsy fingers. But the satisfaction of seeing that once slackened trigger responding to actions the way it was intended felt like a tremendous accomplishment. A solution easily resolved if I had just approached Sony, but not nearly as satisfying. Something I achieved. That by my fair, callous riddled hands, I had nurtured this broken controller back from the brink of extinction. And that feels pretty damn good!

The PlayStation 5 Is A Must Own Console….Just Not Yet.

Let me first preface this by saying that this entire post consists of me contradicting whether or not you should buy a PlayStation 5. So be patient as I waffle on through various, bewildering tangents. Thank you.

Since the rather limited release of the PS5 back in November, a console I was fortunate enough to acquire despite being delivered by the courier equivalent of dysentery, there hasn’t been a day that I haven’t played it. Mostly utilised to stabilise the extensive back catalogue of PS4 game’s I’ve neglected over the years, that I now feel personally obliged to mitigate. With the PlayStation Collection only further compounding this issue. But like any new console there are inherent risks. Potential teething maladies that range from whirring/clicking sounds in the disc drive to full internal malfunctions. And much like the scaremongering associated with the PS4 on release, the naysayers chirping about the issues that plague new consoles has again proven to be largely farcical.

Through my extensive endeavours, my keen analytical observations and studious nocturnal sessions that routinely resulted in me lapsing into unconsciousness, I’ve finally deduced the merits of owning a console at launch and definitively surmised why you should own a PS5 as soon as possible. And the simple answer is, you shouldn’t. If your PS4 is still functional, with a manageable capacity to store further titles, there really isn’t a legitimate, pragmatic reason for owning one. Yet!

The allure of a shiny new game’s console is a difficult stimulus to ignore. “Being one of the first!” is an exciting prospect. Boasting to friends and colleagues that probably care very little about the impulsive whims of a smug, self satisfied narcissist with more disposable money than sense. To me, being one the exceptional few was admittedly a very minor consideration. Principally the decision to purchase such a premium item was largely one of necessity.

My PS4, which I’d previously alluded too as being a launch model has for a couple of years “struggled”. Initially peripheral, audible little concerns, with sudden intermittent clunking soon became a sporadic integration of both ambient heat and sound. Conducting enough heat and noise that it sounded as though the London Philharmonic orchestra were performing Metallica Greatest Hits in a smelting refinery. Declining significantly in it’s last 12 months, most notably it’s ability to read or even accept discs without encouragement, eventually rejecting in the middle of a game, it became apparent that I’d either have to repair the ageing machine at substantial cost, or simply buy a replacement. So why not get the PS5? It made sense to me. A rational decision, if they hadn’t been as difficult to attain as a post Brexit trade deal. But as luck would have it, I secured one. Preordering at a very unsociable hour. And don’t get me wrong, I love the scale interpretation if Lord Of The Rings “Dark Tower”!

The term “Next Gen” is rather misleading colloquialism, with the implication being that the technology contained demonstrates a significant graphical sophistication, reciprocated with a discernable visual and performance quality, superior too anything we’ve experienced before. But truth is that the generational leap isn’t the discernable chasm that divided the any of the previous generations. This Gen is really one of refinement. Polishing and augmenting performances to deliver an experience that is a little more fluid. Intuitive. The real expansion comes courtesy of the controller.

The features housed in the dualshock 5 are easily the PS5’s most compelling resource. The adaptive triggers and haptic feedback are to the PlayStation 5 what the analogue sticks were for the PS1. I’d argue revolutionary! Astrobot, the free, glorified Tech demo admirably exhibits the mutually beneficial synchronisation of the audio and vibrations that eminate from the controller. My daughter, fascinated by the small, jaunty robot gliding across the title card approached me, without any provocation to play this. Having never shown much interest in her daddy’s peculiar distractions, I was rather taken aback by her sudden interest, but at the same time excited to posture the brilliance of a hobby Mummy simply doesn’t understand. So having explained to her the controls, as best as I could to a 4 year old, she went off on her own, casually colliding into every conceivable obstacle.

After those initial few minutes, those awkward tentative steps, her coordination and spatial awareness had improved significantly, hitting oncoming enemies with surprisingly expeditious timing. And like a proud father watching her child winning the egg and spoon race at their school sports day, having tripped their main rivals in the final furlong, I just smiled. Watching my daughter’s face light up when she realised that these tiny little robots are rattling around in the controller was one of the most life affirming moments I’ve experienced being a father. This isn’t just vibrational sensitivity, calibrated to imitate a desired sensation, but more like there ARE tiny robots inhabiting the controller. That it isn’t merely replicating the squelching sensation of walking through mud, but that somehow the character is, and you are somehow experiencing that sensation.

The painful truth though is that as impressive as this technology is, most developers are liable to exclude it. Dismissing it as just another failed Sony implementation. A novelty soon to be forgotten, like the SIXAXIS. To simply disregard this wonderfully compelling function, one that has so many practical application’s for other more expansive games would be a critical error. I hope I’m wrong and that developer’s really understand the potential to elevate game’s beyond the customary visual enhancement.

Ultimately the PS5 is a great console, with tremendous potential, a lofty selection of “free” games, courtesy of the “PlayStation Collection” and one Sony’s mist ambitious control features to date. But if you own a fully working PS4 there is very little reason to own a PS5 right now.

Is The Light On The PS4 Controller Really An Issue?!

Is Motion Control The Future, Or Just A Gimmick?

Living In Electric Dreams; The Eurogamer Expo 2013

It’s 7:20. As I begin to inhale my first conscious breath, with a night consumed by the delicate, asphyxiated embrace of the supple fabrics of my pillow, I stare incredulously at the blinking automated clock sceptical of the numerical displays relevance to my roused state. My mind–still subjected to the inebriated effects of the previous evenings indulgence–struggles to regulate a proficient rationalisation for my revival and assert reasonable sovereignty over my fragmented, domesticated adherence. I recite internal suggestions that could ably disclose my currently roused disposition; “Is it work related?…No. Dentist appointment?…No that was last week. Anniversary? I sincerely hope not!”. With concentrated paucity so intense I’m acutely aware that my restrained “scanner” abilities could send my still unconscious partner into gratuitous convulsions, before I definitively ascertain the significance of the adolescent hour; The Eurogamer Expo! With impetuous optimism of imminent gaming I beset strands of rebellious follicles that have formed an irregular pattern on my scalp into submission, arrange a suitably assimilated garment (Jeans and T-shirt emblazoned with the Dire-wolf sigil that represents my fealty to the Stark’s), and set off with assured vigour. With a stomach lined with thatched, wheat product and an appropriate navigational map; an Indiana Jones style animation, that accelerates my mobility to the event with sustained motility, without need for modernised transportation (if only).

“Character selection; this is as passive as Dark Souls 2 get’s.”

Yes I played the PS4, but no I won’t meander on about it…yet, that will be dispensed at my own discretion in my next article. Subsequently following a brief interlude, I begin in earnest to familiarise myself with the gregarious participants, writhing through a thicket of gamers, scrutinising every stand with enigmatic curiosity and the surrounding prodigious venue that has been cultivated into a habitable labyrinth of technological affluence. It’s easy though to become passively innocuous amongst such distorting climate that almost punctures your senses with levitating pronouncements, tumultuous resolutions and rhythmic assault of your auditive capacity. But once you acclimate to the cursory ambiance and almost suffocating intensity from ventilating latency, the neighbouring flamboyance begins to resonate on an apathetic level. But what’s this captivating, turquoise light that glistens with expectancy, beckoning me like a sultry provocateur? Gesturing with intimate, promiscuous enticements of moist chocolate sponge, smothered in decadent glaze of elegant chocolate sauce and….get that cake away from me, its distracting me! The bespoke ominous light guides me towards my first collaboration of the day, Ratchet & Clank: Into The Nexus. Despite its inelegant veneer, I’m encouraged by its restoration to single player format and platform adventure. This is also an epilogue to the protracted Tools of Destruction narrative which should (hopefully) end the uncertainty surrounding the Lombax’s prospective’s. Whether there will be any conclusive resolution is still clandestine though, but the promised array of destructive, often humorous ballistics at your discretion and the capacity to manipulate the laws of gravitational sovereignty, are all enticing factors.

“Doom the musical? No. But rather an Ebony & Ivory controller.”

Dark Souls 2 mandatory masochism is still prominent, as the augmented difficulty selection varies from likely, to certain death and diligent, structural procedures assures a compressed rendering of expiration. But ultimately if you relish the afforded opportunity to be a cadaver, then Dark Souls 2 is just for you narcissistic necrophiliac’s. Batman makes his triumphant return too with a more impulsive aggression. He’s less methodical and refined vigilant that he inevitably becomes in the Arkham series, but his more contentious stance won’t negate the elegant combat that will see you parrying assaults and retaliate with your own prejudicial advance. Final Fantasy X X2 HD KFC (not entirely sure of the legitimacy of the last acronym) promises more elongated fantasy, that makes the James Bond series seem like commercial. Call Of Duty has explosions, FIFA has Gareth Barry suitably attired in a Real Madrid shirt (still grossly over-evaluated though) and Assassins Creed IV: Black Tide, Liberation Brotherhood features a talking octopus named Oscar who–through the flamboyant flailing of its tentacles–can communicate with other nautical creatures, discussing various environmental hazards, the vast depletion of it’s habitat and serenade you with its own rendition of “Under the sea”. OK, so maybe I was a little remiss in my conduct, with no parable sense of clarification on the pertained content. But my moderate allotted time was callously designated by inherent availability, with only residual association with some of the more popular titles. But with abstract delegation I can assure you–on an a purely illusory basis–that if you’re a fan of the above content, then you will enjoy them regardless of my flippancy.

“Gran Turismo 6. And who says the industry is stagnating.”

Now I could reduce the remainder of this article advocating the grandeur of the imminent nobility of the PS4’s parable viscera and besetting its lustrous, angular contours with implicit fervour, with considerate, pedantic ovation. But I’ll humbly delegate this appraisal for the moment, preserved temporarily for my next article. However I will say that this eminent exhibition has remained obstinately empathetic to the professional domestication of its particulars and enveloping ample coverage to every facet of the industry with a diligent aptitude, without faltering into tendentious partiality. The venue was a perfect setting with bountiful concession stands to nourish your dwindling energy, and merchandise to satisfy your hoarding restitution. Only Eurogamer could infuse a unifying solidarity amongst such resonating, often divisive attendants, with a multitude of differing attitudes and preferences. There’s no ambient hostility from the competitive rivals or the assembled congregation, nor is their deceptive provocations that coerce you to specified partition with Machiavellian intent; just a consolidating association of gamers looking to ogle fresh content, sample developer’s nurtured wares and part with some disposable income. Sure there’s an understandable propensity from developer’s exulted exposition’s, dispensing ornate trinkets that your likely discard as soon as their eyes are averted, but that’s all part of it’s appeal; the ostentatious allures and self sanctioning of their respective products that create necessary excitement for a future yet to be commenced. Here’s to Eurogamer Expo 2014. I’ll see you next year.

Let me know your thoughts on this years show? And what game/hardware are you most anticipating? Cheers.